Before I Change My Mind review – earnest recalibration of the coming-of-age drama

Being the new kid at school is hard enough. Being introduced to your peers part-way through a sex education class… that's a new level of embarrassment. Despite the awkwardness, Robin (Vaughan Murrae) is unfazed when instructed to “take a seat” in a room divided into boys and girls. They plop themselves down in the middle of the group in Before I Change My Mind's first and most obvious declaration of gender nonconformity. Despite this on-the-nose visual, though, what follows is an earnest recalibration of the coming-of-age drama, a solid debut feature from writer-director Trevor Anderson.

“What are you?” is a question that feels as though it will loom over Robin. After initial confusion, though, Robin’s fellow classmates quickly drop the subject. Anderson too isn’t interested in unpicking Robin’s identity to reach a place of final conclusion. Instead, their gender or sexual identity is not something that the film endeavours to explain, nor does Anderson’s film attempt to box Robin into the label of girl, boy, or non-binary. Before I Change My Mind doesn’t inflict judgement on this young person, but with eye-level framing the film positions itself alongside them as they navigate their new home in 1987 Alberta.

Though the film may offer the implication that Robin is free from hostility, such an assumption is false. They’re chased home by school bully Carter (Dominic Lippa) and later beaten up by Jenn (Milana Bochinski), the wannabe Regina George of the school, and yet they persevere with brazenness. It’s especially surprising, considering events that have transpired, that Robin jumps at the chance to be paired up with Carter for a school trip. Carter is initially repulsed by Robin’s softness and astronaut doodles, yet as a cosmic force draws them together, the pair are lured closer by each other’s adventurous spirit.

Anderson’s playful script, co-written with Fish Griwkowsky, chronicles the mismatched duo as they negotiate relationships with girls and dip their toes into underage drinking. Though there’s an investment in Robin’s world, some dialogue falls flat. A moment of stargazing and a music teacher lamenting “you can be whatever you want to be in life” are sweet but threaten to topple the film into shallow territory – though fine performances from these young actors help to soften the waywardness. Murrae, in particular, shoulders much of the film’s trickier contradictions and roots Robin in a youthful complexity, especially as an infatuation for their bully grows and they’re encouraged to participate in acts of bullying.

Enamoured by ‘80s pastiche, Before I Change My Mind employs VHS video and polaroid montages to hint at Robin’s troubled backstory: an absent mother, an introverted father, and a home they have left. Littered with camp homages, Anderson roots this exploration in distinct time and place with beige and floral interiors. Unlike such visuals, the film’s freshness comes with considered angling that reconsiders classic tropes of school bullies, distant parents, and burgeoning self-discovery. Anderson’s portrait of a wallflower ultimately glows with the embers of Robin’s burning imagination.

Before I Change My Mind was screened as part of the BFI Flare Festival 2023. A UK release date is yet to be announced.